Conquering Your Fears

I made a reference to this in an earlier post that one of the ways to overcome or at least deal with anxiety is to overcome your fears. I have had to do this and it has helped come out of my comfort zone as well as my battle with GAD.

One to meet a fear head on rather than avoid it. This is certain tasks at work, public speaking, meeting new people etc.. I found that avoiding a task you fear just makes things worse and prolongs your fear. Also, if you do something like miss a day of work to avoid a task or job that you also become fearful of the consequences that may occur as a result. Also, meeting these as challenges also helps you grow as a person as you grow stronger and less fearful.

It also helps to talk to someone to help conquer a fear whether it be a spouse,friend, family member or clergy person. More often than not you get good advice or at least see things from a different perspective. Sometimes you may have to go into professional counselling to get the help you need. Don’t be afraid to get help to over fear.

Guidance from above even helps to as you pray you have spiritual help in conquering a fear. If you are not spiritual person a inspirational quote from a historical figure or famous person may be helpful. It is about finding the inner peace you need to get through a difficult or fearful situation and it helpful to keep you calm thought.

Finally, it is often a matter of of putting things in perspective as our fears and worries seldom come to pass. In his book How To Stop Worrying And Start Living Dale Carnegie talks about the worst case scenario in a situation we are worrying about. More often than not it doesn’t occur and when it does the impact isn’t often nearly as hard as we imagined it. It is often about weighing the positives and negatives of a situation and the positives often out weigh the negatives.

Just a word here that we are not to get reckless and put one’s life in danger if we are afraid of certain animal such as bear or things such as heights. Trying to engage a wild animal or combat a fear of heights by doing something death defying is not a way to combat fear but is dangerous and foolish. Common sense is often your greatest ally in overcoming our fears.

More Tips To Deal With The COVID-19 Crisis

While things have calmed down a bit with COVID-19 Virus we are far from out of the woods. There may very well be a second wave and as matter of fact there has been a spike of young people who have gotten the virus. Here are some tips as anxiety increases once again and to set your mind at ease.

1.Wear Your Mask

There has been a lot of debate whether or not we should obey various laws and companies who have made mask wearing mandatory. But When we out into public we should obey the rules here (unless you have a medical reason not to) and set minds at ease. If you aren’t you are not protesting liberty or making a statement but you are potentially putting lives in danger. So WEAR YOUR MASK!

2.Avoid The News

Or at the least take a break from it. While things are pretty good here in Canada news in other parts of the world especially what’s going in The United States and South Korea are a cause for alarm. News outlets seemed to be more interested in scaring the public than reporting the facts. There is also a lot of misinformation out there (especially on the internet) and many news outlets online have a specific agenda and don’t exactly have unreliable and/or biased sources. Plus having all these views jumbles the facts and adds to anxiety.

3.Avoid Crowds

I know it is summer and it is time to hit the beach or park and we all have been cooped up in our homes for months.But it is best to avoid them as many people still do not practice social distancing and are often very crowded. If you must go try at a time that isn’t peak for most people and practice social distancing. As for restaurants try to take your food to go as these places can get crowded (at least for this pandemic).I know it doesn’t taste as good but it is safer this way and does get you out of the house.

The reason I bring these up is that these may be the two cases why there may be a spike in cases in young people and also may cause anxiety when going out. Also, wearing masks and practice social distancing should be emphasized here as well.

4.Put Things Into Perspective

The truth is most people who contact this disease survive and fully recover. Also, our ancestors have lived through way worse circumstances than we can even image. It is best to keep your mind occupied by reading, writing or picking up a hobby. Keeping the mind sharp helps keeps it from worry as I have learned in living through this.

These are just ideas to keep one from getting too anxious throughout this pandemic and to relax mentally with all the information we are receiving.

Things I Am Not Afraid Of

In battling Generalized Anxiety Disorder it is easy to be afraid of a lot of things. There are many fears that are common with many people which I don’t actually have. Here are some of them:

1.Flying

I don’t fear flying as I have never had any trouble boarding an airplane. I found myself in the several times I have flown I had it a very comfortable experience. I feel more at ease in an airplane than I do in a car and my anxiety has not popped up at all each time I have flown.(It may have something to do with the stats involving car accidents and airplane crashes).

2.Travelling

This is connected to one but I also have no fear of going to another place or country. As a matter of fact I love to do a lot more and would if time and finances would permit me. The curiosity in me wants me to explore other cultures and landscapes. My sense of adventure overtakes my anxiety here.

3. Animals

I don’t have a fear of most animals as my years of visiting the zoo and having cats at home have given a love of various creatures. I especially love domestic animals like cats and dogs and would have several pets if my wife wasn’t allergic to both. I am definitely an animal lover and especially love cats.

4.Expressing Myself

Even though I am a quiet introvert I have little or no trouble expressing myself when I need to. After all, I do write this blog and update it regularly. I also express myself verbally to people when I need to as well. I have to admit though I keep my anxiety under wraps for the most part.

These are just some things that I do have any fear but unfortunately my fears often overbalance my non[-fears a lot of the time.

 

Progress I Have Made

In this ever going battle with GAD there has been a lot of victories over the years and have had to step out of my comfort many times in order to combat my fears. There are times when I had to get back on the proverbial horse after falling off and got a few examples here.

I used to have a fear of driving especially city driving as I would tense up and my stomach would be in knots. I would try to avoid it as much as possible.In the winter I would only drive if I really had to. Now I drive all the time and feel very comfortable doing both in the country and city. I can even do it in really bad weather without getting too tense.

Public speaking was another fear I had (I am sure I am not alone here). I had problems in school doing this and tired to avoid it as much as possible. Now in my adult life I have done sermons in church and have had to give presentations at previous places I have worked at.While I still get butterflies in my stomach when have to give a talk but have developed a lot more confidence in doing so.

Just meeting new people also flares up my anxiety as this goes hand in hand with social anxiety. I covered that going to various groups such as Bible studies and prayer meetings at church has really helped me and just going helps as well. It not only gives me the chance to meet people but to express myself and see things from a different perspective as I talk to others. Sometimes it doesn’t pay to just sit at home and you have put yourself out there.

These are just some examples how I have overcome anxiety in my life. There are still a lot of struggles as the battle continues. It is matter of stepping out of your comfort zone and facing your fears head on.

Fatigue

Another issue I have with GAD is fatigue as this is common for people who have this disorder. I have been fine lately but today I have been struggling with it. It seems to come and go at times but I seem to have it more often than not.

There are times when I sleep for 11 /12 hours and wake up tired and if it is a day I have off I will nap in the afternoon. Then I still feel tired enough to go to bed early at night. There are times especially at work where I have just enough energy to get by and have to load up with caffeine. But the problem with caffeine of course is it increases my anxiety.

One way to beat fatigue is to get some exercise which increases my adrenaline and I usually hit the treadmill for half an hour. Sometimes if it is nice out I will go for a short walk just to be outdoors and get some sun. Even just moving around can help sometimes.

Also reading a good book or finding something thought provoking online helps keep me awake as it keeps the mind sharp. When I get winded up it helps break my fatigue and keeps me sharp and focused as well as awake.  I find that having my mind going is as good as having my body going.

I find that you have lots of caffeine as mention earlier does not help my anxiety. I avoid energy drinks especially I find that help me surge for an hour then I am back to square one. Same with sugary snacks and soft drinks.(I am also trying to keep the weight off). Eating right and getting the right amount of exercise are key in helping this. 

I should mention that I also do shift work and have to”flip my body” which compounds this problem.I often have bizarre sleep patterns on top of anxiety and often run a sleep deficit which may actually be the problem except I know that it is a symptom of anxiety. It is a matter of looking after myself mentally and physically.

A New Phobia

Another thing I have learned living with Generalized Anxiety Disorder is that it encompasses a lot of other phobias .One that I have is phonophobia also known as ligyophobia or sonophobia which is the fear of loud noise. In particular it is the fear of being yelled at.

I have had this fear for a long time without realizing it is a phobia and could be from the fact I had ear infections as a kid or that I just am sensitive to noise.I didn’t get yelled at often as a child but have had it often in adulthood. I did get it occasionally at school but seldom at home when I was a kid.

It happens frequently at my current job as it seems the only way the foremen can communicate to others is by shouting at you. It is loud in the place but I seemed to get yelled at the slightest provocation. It is not as bad now but on a previous crew I was on it was pretty bad.

On the previous crew the foreman would yell me for often very trivial matters I seemed to be singled out. Also, one his lackeys also seemed to single me out as I got yelled by him often while no one else seemed to be yelled at all by him. This did not help my anxiety (obviously) but made me not want to go into work at all. I often felt very nervous and shaky (among other things) before going into work.

I figured I would have been desensitized to this by now but I as I have learned phobias don’t away on their own but take some helps. There are ways to cope such as tune them out , realize it is them and not you and realize that there are jerks in the world. Also, I live in very quiet environment so it is easy to decompress at home. Even writing about it helps me cope.

As for loud noises I find that at home I can put my earbuds in and listen to some good music or just have things at the right volume. Even ear protection is home or when you are going out is helpful in combatting this phobia. Unfortunately I have to live with the fact that our society can be noisy a lot of the time.

GAD and Insomia

Of the problems I have had with GAD and living with it is I get periods of insomnia. I don’t have problems sleeping all the time but there are times that I have falling and/or staying asleep.

I find there are times where my mind is racing 100 miles a minute as soon as my head hits the pillow. I am either worrying about work or finances or I just thinking crazy stuff. Also,I should mention that I am a shift worker and it is hard for me to have set hours of nightly sleep. Sometimes things going on in the world pop their ugly head up just as I am trying to get to sleep. This usually occurs when I am trying to sleep during the day(although sometimes at night).

I also get sleep anxiety at times usually on the days and nights I am scheduled to work. I get the fear of oversleeping or waking up groggy and end up waking hours before I have to. Or I fear that I may have scary or weird dreams and it will disturb my sleep. I have the bad habit of checking the time when I can’t sleep which makes things worse.

How do I cope? Well I have picked up a few habits that have helped me curb this problem. I have started drinking caffeine-free herbal teas before I go to bed.  I also find listening to music and/or doing some light reading before helps as well. Even watching something funny on YouTube can help as it keeps my minds off some of my troubles.

Even I am going to sleep, I found that I have to curl up my body and to focus on pleasant thoughts like beautiful landscapes, beaches and even kittens and puppies. Also,breathing exercises that I have read about online and put them in practice. I require virtually no noise meaning even a white noise machine and whale music is out.( It often gets difficult during the day with all the noises outside.) I need a cool room to sleep in but a warm bed. Mercifully my mattress is warm during the winter but need the fans going in the summer as my bedroom is the hottest room in the house.

I still struggle with sleep at times as anxiety and depression get the better of me. But with these things and others that I am researching I hope to nip this in the bud.

Tips For Overcoming Social Anxiety

As I have mentioned in an earlier post I also struggle with social anxiety. But I have found some way to overcome it and these are methods I have personally tried.

1. Be Proactive On Social Media

I know this sounds like a cop out or very cheap but hear me out. Simply commenting on a post on Facebook or Twitter can help overcome your fear of dealing with people and in the process let your voice be heard. It can also allow you to start a conversation in the safety of your home and to put yourself out there. (However try not to be offensive to doing so.)

2. Get Involved

At my church they often have events such as game nights and monthly men’s breakfasts. I found that these events are great way to meet new people and get to talk about yourself (After all who doesn’t Like to do that). If you don’t attend a house of worship going to something like a community dinner or a convention that involves a hobby or interest helps to get to know like minded people and put yourself out there.

3.Volunteer 

Another way to get out there is to volunteer for a cause in your community or place of worship. There are plenty of opportunities as many organizations need people to help. This not only gives you a chance to meet new people but to do some good in your community but society as a whole.

4. Use The Phone

If you are anything like me you dread or hate using the phone. However calling a friend or family member can ease your worries and get you more comfortable. Even something simple as calling a store to check their hours or to see if a certain product is available can go a long way to ease your tension.

5. Engage More When You Are Out

When you are out shopping or at a restaurant you can be more chatty with staff. More often than not they will engage in conversation with you. For instance there is a record shop in town I go to buy albums and the owner will sometimes come up to talk to me and will talk about music for a bit. Even asking store help questions can ease anxiety.

I hope these suggestions help as they have worked for me in the past. The key taking the first step which is ultimately up to you to do.